Counseling For Teens And Tweens

Is your teen falling behind with their studies, sports, extracurricular activities or after school job? Maybe you know your child is capable and potentially high-achieving, but worry that something is holding them back. Do you worry if your child’s emotional reactions are normal?

Is your child showing signs of being overwhelmed? They may seem more on edge, withdrawn, emotional, anxious. Maybe your teen has had full-blown panic attacks, leaving you feeling helpless and afraid for their wellbeing.

It may be that your teen is having trouble sleeping, skipping meals or eating too much. Perhaps the transition to high school has been more difficult than anticipated. Or has there has been a big change in your family, such as a move, divorce or loss of a loved one. Does your child seem to be having a really hard time adjusting? Whatever may be happening, you may find, more and more, your interactions with them are emotional and frustrating.  Watching your teen suffer can be deeply distressing, especially if they seem unfocused, drained or persistently self-critical.

You Want To Help Your Child But Don’t Know How

As a parent, you may feel powerless to help your teen. When you offer advice or encouragement, your discussions trail into silence or escalate into disagreements You might sit awake at night worrying about your teen’s excessive dieting or exercise, wonder whether he or she is experimenting with drugs or alcohol, or have concerns about your teen’s friendships and/or romantic relationships. Once home from school, your teen might avoid discussing the day, perhaps going to his or her room and locking the door—effectively shutting you out. Perhaps you feel like you’ve somehow failed as a parent and that you’ve lost your child. You may desperately wish you could reach out to your teen, but feel you lack the tools to do so.

The Challenges Teens and Their Parents Face

Being a teenager is hard. Teens are struggling to form their own identity, feel more independence, fit in socially, and manage academic pressure. They experience physical changes, social pressure, increased academic demands, and more freedom, which also means more choices. While some teens manage these changes and choices well, others struggle. As a parent, it’s difficult to know if intense emotions, anger, withdrawal, or rebellious behavior are normal development or a sign that something is wrong. You might notice the ways you communicated and set limits with your child until now aren’t working now that he or she is older. As a result, there might be more arguments or tension at home.

Teenagers and Tweens Often Experience Complicated Feelings During High School

If your teen seems alienated, has difficulty making new friends or gives you the silent treatment, you are not alone. Many parents feel estranged from their children during adolescence – a time when many teens’ main desire is to escape from the world. For a lot of teens, high school functions like a mini-society in which social segregation and fitting in with a group mean everything. High school is a particularly trying time for girls, who can obsess over their appearance, feeling as though they don’t have the right clothes, can’t attract a romantic partner or aren’t skinny enough. It’s common for teens to experience anxiety and/or depression if they have trouble establishing meaningful relationships with peers. For teens who don’t “fit in,” simply going to class can elicit anxiety, which may explain why your teen dreads going to school in the morning, appearing only to go out of a sense of obligation. To cope with the pressures of social and academic life, some teens look for fulfillment in romantic relationships, while others may begin to experiment with drugs and alcohol. They may refuse to answer questions about their day, leaving mom and dad frustrated by their lack of communication.

Teen Anxiety & Chronic Stress

The pressure on teenagers can feel overwhelming. These years often create anxiety about getting good grades, fitting in or navigating social groups. Your teen might agonize over social cliques at school, feel like he or she isn’t attractive or skinny enough or fret over having few or no friends. You may even have difficulty getting your teen out of bed in the morning, finding that he or she doesn’t want to go to school because the social anxiety is overwhelming. In fact, almost 10% of teenagers have an anxiety disorder, which can wreck-havoc on their immune system, and physical and emotional wellbeing.

Teen Depression is more common then you realize

While it is normal for teens to experience mood changes and stronger emotions, ongoing sadness and irritability may indicate your teen is suffering from depression.  In fact, almost 20 percent of teenagers experience depression before they even reach adulthood, yet only 30 percent of depressed teenagers are actually being treated for their depression. Depression is more than just sadness and actually impacts a teenager’s functioning. If you suspect your teen may be depressed it’s important to get them help as research shows that depression can get stronger over time and make treatment last longer down the road.

The Effects Of Covid Are Real

In addition to normal teen difficulties, our tweens and teens are having to make huge adjustments during the pandemic. In a matter of days, their worlds were changed suddenly. They went from having thriving social lives and sports to quarantine and distance learning. Furthermore, milestones, such as graduations, birthday parties, tournaments, and dances no longer happened. Birthdays were celebrated socially distant and Zoom became the new hangout. It’s no surprise that teens’ moods would be impacted. You might notice your teenager becoming more irritable, withdrawn, or sad. While this isn’t surprising given the circumstances, it can be an indicator that they need some support in their life.

We Speak Teen

What makes us really good at therapy with teens? We’re terrific at connecting with teenagers. How do we do this? We aren’t old and stuffy. For lack of a better word, we can relate to teenagers. We talk back. We engage. We’re willing to be unorthodox. Sometimes we’ll listen to music or go for a walk. We never just hang out with teens, but we recognize that it sometimes takes different methods to connect with different kids. We’re also never ever fake. We don’t pretend to be cool, know more about music or what’s happening in a teen’s life. We’re willing to laugh at ourselves and invite teens to do this as well.

Another strength we have in connecting with teens is that we work with a lot of teenagers and have for many years. Teens talk to us a lot in therapy about what they’re dealing with, including depression, anxiety, school, fighting with family, bullying, trauma, preparing for college, grades, sex, sexual orientation, gender identity, dating, and more. We are fluent in and familiar with some of what’s really going on with teens. We have a sort of inside track. Teens talk to us and because of that, we’re more experienced at talking to teens.

With the Help of a Teen Therapist in Cincinnati, Your Child Can Begin to Prosper in all Areas of Life

High school doesn’t have to wreak havoc on your teen’s self-esteem. We will help your teen gain the skills to feel more secure, improve academic achievement and find fulfillment in relationships. Building on strengths and engaging in enjoyed activities—like art, music, or other extracurricular pursuits—helps build confidence, which can ultimately help your teen find happiness in other areas of life. If your teen struggles academically, with your teen’s consent we can speak with teachers, help develop organizational skills, and even discuss homework.​

If you’re feeling hurt by your teen’s refusal to speak to you about what’s going on at school, know that there are some topics—such as a breakup with a partner or feelings about the body—that are too embarrassing for some teens to discuss with parents. A parent is a child’s greatest advocate, but often all that’s needed is an unbiased, trusted adult to enable your teen to open up about the issues that are causing him or her pain. With the help of therapy, teens can talk through their problems, identify issues that are creating anxiety and learn to manage complicated emotions.

You may be ready to take the next step toward teen counseling, but still may have some questions or concerns…

Q: I think my teen needs help but he or she refuses to come.

Many teenagers aren’t excited about the idea of going to therapy. They might feel uncomfortable talking to a stranger, they might not want to admit there is anything wrong, or they might want to spend the time doing something more fun. As a parent, gently explain your concerns to your teen, while letting them know therapy is non-negotiable. Also let them know you would like to give them the opportunity to choose their therapist. Many teens are more open to therapy after the first session with the right therapist. They begin to see the therapist as an ally rather than a threat.

Q: Isn’t this just a phase? Maybe they will grow out of it.

While it’s true that nearly every teenager experiences some social anxiety and estrangement, are you really willing to risk the possibility your teen’s problems may be more serious than just growing pains? The experiences we have as teenagers leave lasting impressions on our self-confidence as adults. In fact, many adults find themselves still dealing with issues like friendship, love and social status that started out in high school. Don’t let your teen’s unresolved issues travel with him or her to college and beyond. It’s best to tackle your teen’s emotional issues now so that they can be healthy and self-sufficient in the future. Lessons learned during adolescent therapy will set them up for success later in life, allowing them to manage their emotions, preserve relationships, and function more effectively for years to come.

Q: Going to a child therapist feels like admitting defeat

Sending your child to teenage counseling doesn’t mean you have failed as a parent! It just means you are using all available resources to give your child every chance of leading a healthy adult life. If your teen or preteen has been pushing away from you, you are probably feeling hurt and defeated. Believe it or not, their desire to individuate is a sign that their development is progressing naturally. Your willingness to provide extra assistance during this dramatic transformation is a sign of great parenting.

Q: Can I attend the intake consultation?

Your teen’s counselor will have you join the first part of the consultation to provide consents (where required) as well as important background information. The counselor may then ask to meet with your teen one on one, which is important to build trust and rapport. As therapy continues, your child’s therapist will keep you updated as needed on progress in therapy, while also respecting your child’s right to privacy.

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